Insulting God

I was casually chatting with my best friend on Saturday, and we were talking about my blog. I was thanking him for the fourth time last week (i believe), for taking the time to read my stuff. He kidded with me, saying that if i thanked him one more time he'd stop reading my stuff completely. But i droned on about how i felt about my writing - that it wasn't quite where i want it to be yet and that i had this ideal level that i don't seem to be reaching. Guess what he said:

"If i was nearer to you, I'll smack you."

Stunned, I wasn't quite sure how to respond. So, i laughed and asked him, "What? You think I'm good enough?"

And then he replied, "I think it's healthy to strive for 'better'.... but I get tired of hearing that clause of I'm not good enough everytime...."

And I was quiet. For lack of words. Lost in thought.

He had to leave, so the conversation ended there. But I hadn't thought about it like that before. Can someone really get tired of you belittling yourself? Obviously, your intentions were different. You honestly felt that you could be a little better, strive a little harder - towards that ideal of yours.

But what if it were God who told me that? That He was tired of hearing me say that I'm not good enough? According to Ephesians 1:3,

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ,..."

The Lord has given me all my abilities and giftings. He is the author of all.

Colossians 1:16
"For by Him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by Him and for Him. "

So are my giftings really not good enough? Impossible! The Lord is perfect! Therefore, me questioning my abilities would then be an insult to God, wouldn't it? It's really important to remind myself constantly that it's all about Jesus and not about me. I need to worry if He'll be pleased with how I'm using the gifts, not how I feel about it. If friends or strangers affirm me, then I'm doing something right and should be motivated to continue using the gifts for His glory.

Of course I'm not encouraging big-headedness (though i must becareful in this area too). What I'm trying to do here is remind myself (and perhaps others) that God gave us the gifts we have now. The more we seek Him through His Word, the more better the image reflected, the more closer we are to Him. As we become more Christ-like day by day, He completes us, and the gifts we have.

Romans 8:28 says that all things work together for good for those who love Him and have been called according to His purpose.

So I'm going to just continue loving the Lord, focusing on impacting others and concentrating on what He has called me to do with the gifts He has given me. I want to stay positive rather than digress and distract myself with redundant worry that I'm not good enough.

Since God chose me, who am I to doubt His judgement?