Thursday, January 31, 2008

Freedom Talk

I'm free.


Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Wearing a Mask

An editting session.
Jumbled up a couple of filters on CS2.
So here's the before and after.
Just getting to know the darned software.

Friday, January 25, 2008

Don't Know Why I Didn't Come

It's definitely too late for apologies so i shan't bother. I wasn't here for Christmas and neither was I for New Year's. Sue me.

Decembers have always been and always will be my most occupied time of the year. And if it were a race, my Januaries would come in second. But i'm not being read for my daft excuses as to how busy I was the past couple of months, neither am i being read for my boo-hoo reasons of why i shouldn't have even started a blog anyway due to my severe lack of discipline for it.

Come to think of it, I have no idea why i'm still being read. (Using this opportunity to thank the two of you who log on religiously to get your daily supply of Pocket Tissues.) All I know is, it's a new year.

Gosh, I have to let that sink in. It's a new year!

Too late to mourn for lost time, too late to make resolutions, too late for apologies. What's my new year good for? At least, that was the exasperating question that has been swirling off the top of my cranium for the past few days. It isn't anymore.

I have been suffering gastiritis for the past week. That's what the doc said anyway. Well technically, no. He suspected indisgestion, but experienced buddies told me that it was really gastric pains that was sending my stomach AWOL. Nothing Actal pills couldn't cure though.


I've always just suspected that it was an insurgence of little purple smurfs, having the time of their lives just hacking away at the walls of my fragile stomach.

It's my stomach. I have a say too.

But going through the pain for a week, I felt almost robbed of my time. There was just so much i wanted to do, but i was so restricted by my cage of pain then that all i could do was just sit around and be sick all day. I couldn't so much as breathe without aching. i resolved to thinking instead. Brilliant idea, right?


"What's the new year for then?" I interrogate myself. Do i feel any 'newer'? Do I forget mistakes of the past and press on with much valor only to make new ones? And if one is allowed to be sarcastic, the purpose of the new year would be: EXASPERATION. Hah!

Truthfully, I think I'm just tired at the fact that I'm human. I'm exhausted at the thought of making my kajillionth mistake for the kajillionth time! But then again, who isn't tired? Why be like everybody else? Why be tired? Why be human for that matter?


So yeah, gastric-smurfaritis does that to people. It causes you to think of things you really don't want to. they cause you to make heavy attempts at answering rhetorical questions. They cause you to think like the loneliest, and the most insignificant person on the planet - and then when it leaves....

.....Hoho, if the bleeding pain ever leaves, it leaves you in want... in the sickening desire to actually have answers to impossible questions.


I miss being human in my innocence. I miss being able to be human and still dream. I miss being human and the ability to be reckless.

Lord, help me learn from my mistakes. Not cower behind the fact that I've done them and suffered the ugly consequences.

Lord, help me live.
Lord, I can't wait for the Switchfoot concert!

So, what's my new year for?
For unborn ideas waiting to be delivered.
For dreams yet to be dreamt.
For goals yet to be achieved.
For love yet to be conceived.
For healing yet to complete.
For mistakes yet to occur.
For friends yet to be made.
For the God yet to be experienced.

And all bleeding thanks to gastric-smurfaritis! Hurrah!

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Freedom Talk

A day I wish never was.

Nevertheless, it's a good time to forget.

It's a good time to forgive.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

New Compositions : I Lose

by Phoebe Lee Mathius

You're my design
I made you the way you are
You'll never find
Someone other

Prechorus I:
Still you go away
in your impatience
all i can say is stay
and promise you aviation, my love
i promise you aviation, my love

So i lose you to
Things i don't compete with
Things i thought would never precede me
So i lose you toa beautiful discovery
So tangible, So carefree
mesmerizing you
away from me
away from me

You are my dream
I saw you the way you are
You'll never seem
like someone other

Prechorus II:
Still you steal away
in your disillusion
Don't go, please stay
I promise you aviation, my love
I promise you aviation, my love

So i lose you to
Things i don't compete with
Things i thought would never precede me
So i lose you toa beautiful discovery
So tangible, So carefree
mesmerizing you
away from me
away from me...

New Compositions : You Inside Me

by Phoebe Lee Mathius

Just like the heels that kill my soles
Iniquity - it bores a hole
Into my heart
Into my head
Alive yet faint
Breathing yet dead

Just like the hurt that hides behind my smile
Dishonesty torments me all the while
stabbing my lungs
wounding my mind
let me escape
oh, let me find....

fill the void building in-
you covered and you saved
You Inside Me

Chorus 2:
clear the hate building in-
you colored and you said you loved
You Inside Me

Friday, January 4, 2008

The Rumour is True!

Switchfoot to rock Malaysia

SURF'S up Malaysia! Modern rock outfit Switchfoot will be hitting our shores for the first time on Feb 2 so don't miss this opportunity to catch this American act live at the Kuala Lumpur Convention Centre (Hall 4).
Known for energetic live performances, the band, consisting of Jon Foreman (vocals, guitar), Tim Foreman (bass), Chad Butler (drums), Jerome Fontamillas (guitar, keyboards, backing vox) and Drew Shirley (guitar) will be bringing on ‘The Switchfoot sound’ – a melodic crunch of densely layered noise which includes electronic experimentation, hard-driving guitar riffs and a few spacey ballads for good measure.

Rock outfit Switchfoot will be performing at the Kuala Lumpur Convention Centre in Kuala Lumpur on Feb 2.
The San Diego-raised band members are also avid surfers and got their name from a surfing term and gained mainstream recognition with the 2003 album The Beautiful Letdown, which has sold 2.3 million copies and featured hit singles such as Meant To Live and Dare You To Move.
Switchfoot was formed way back in 1996 and its latest effort Oh! Gravity was released at the tail end of 2006.
Switchfoot's concert in Kuala Lumpur on Feb 2 is presented by One Armed Productions.
Opening act is Love Me Butch. Tickets, now on sale, are priced at RM123 (pre-sale) and available at Axcess Tickets counters. Hotline is 03-7711 5000.
Browse ( or ( for ticket outlets across the country.

Find this story online. Here.