My Friend In Time Of Need

It all began with a sneeze in the evening. Caused by a speck of dust mayhaps. Having acute sinus issues, one sneeze was enough to hand me a one-way ticket to a sneezing fit. Seven sneezes in a row was the most i counted. Gah.

My sinuses weren't that hard to deal with. I've had it ever since i can remember. But what i disliked most about having sinuses was what entailed it. Sinuses leave my immune system in battered condition, and prone to other vices. Namely, Influenza. *shudder*

There has got to be an easier way to fight off Influenza.

Needless to say, I was still up with a drippy nose at four in the morning. Not unlike a broken tap. For Phoebe, this was a very BAD thing. My body was under siege! Much blood from my valiant white cells was being spilled. I could almost feel the viruses battering the gates of my fort. My empire was under attack and all i could ever do was wait it out. Unfortunate for me, we lost the battle and the country of Phoebe was conquered.

And so there I was, sitting in my bed - prepped up against the wall, miserable. I had a splitting headache, my body ached everywhere and i couldn't breathe through my nose. Going back to sleep wasn't exactly an easy task, but i eventually did anyway. With my mouth wide open. At least I think it was wide open.

Three hours later, Influenza reigned supreme. I began my day with a horrendous sore throat and though my nose wasn't drippy anymore, it was in a state, nothing short of disgusting. Then the inevitable happened. My throat began to spew out contemptuous things from the very pits of hell. This was going to be a lovely week, I thought.

Trudging to my desk, I saw him. "Vic, what are you doing here?" I exclaimed, eyes lighting up. He was quiet as always. I walked over to him, held him and smiled. "Here to brighten my day, are you?"

Removing what covered his body, I brought him closer to me; to breathe him all in. Good ole' Vicks has never failed me when it came to clearing my stuffed up nose. Which is why this post is dedicated to the ultimate flu-buddy, the Vicks Vapor Inhaler. Live forever! (Or at the most, three years.)

This little inhaler holds about 0.5ml of product, and costs only two to three dollars. It lasts for quite a period - just as long as you keep it closed after utilizing it. It's fairly easy to use, just unscrew its long cap, close one nostril and put the tube at the entrance of the open nostril. Take a whiff or two (take as many as necessary) and then repeat with the other nostril. You'll feel a cold rush up your nostrils and down the back of your throat. You'll be able to breathe through your nose again in no time.

Before inhalers, i'm sure most of you have probably heard of the Vicks Vaporub. The one that comes in a little jar-like bottle full of cream? Well, unlike its predecessor, the Inhaler keeps the powerful smell of menthol and camphor for you and you alone. No matter how often you snort it. *chuckles* You won't reek of Vicks wherever you go, like many other remedies.

I'm still suffering post-influenza. Coughing up things in colors i never knew existed, things that i could never give a justified description for. But thanks to my Vicks Vapor Inhaler, I'm a little less miserable and a little more productive today.

Picture Sources:
http://www.herbsforhealth.com/index.php?page=article&do=view&id=cold
http://www.magazine.ucla.edu/features/flu-fighters
http://www.fotosearch.com/illustration/sleepy.html
http://www.dooyoo.co.uk/health-products/vicks-vapor-inhaler/1027697

Time Capsule

When i was in secondary school, I had a habit of stuffing keepsakes into a solid light blue box i bought at an S&J gift shop branch. It's been sitting in a huge cardboard packing box ever since we moved into our small bungalow. I dug it up today and opened it to look at the content. And i found this:

This was the last thing i put into my "time capsule". My work tag. From my first proper job ever. I worked in a medical-utilities production facility as a clerk, months after SPM. I reported to a lovely lady, whom i knew as Cindy and typed out, created and checked forms on a spreadsheet software. I've also had to scan pictures of packages and pictures of products and update the factory's database. People in there raise forms for everything: to suggest a rule, to change something, to put something in motion, etc.. So you can almost conjure up an imagery of the vast volumes of documentations one needed to complete in a day. Fun. Haha.

As an attempt to resume all manner of seriousness, I learnt a lot at my first job, actually. I gained experience, i learned to be orderly, i was afraid to be idle, and i earned my own money! All those great things helped me build up my confidence and self-esteem. A LOT. However, life being a bowl of cherries, you're bound to stumble across some bad ones. So amidst the fresh and sweet, I also learnt to be wary of the bad cherries. Friendships, for one. I grew distrustful of certain colleagues. It didn't help that they ransacked my things once, in attempt to find my salary letter from the Human Resource Department (this i find quite amusing to this day). I felt like i was in a literal soap theatre. The drama in the office was a little too overbearing.

I didn't have many like-minded friends there, i was the only person who was still in her teens in that department. Seventeen plus, to be exact. I turned eighteen whilst working there. I would have lunch all on my own, gobble up my food in 10 to 15 minutes and then return to my cubicle. I'd leave my bag in the drawer and lock it, then (and this part i looked forward to everyday) i'd take a long, nice walk around and about the facility. It really was huge. So everyday, I'd explore and discover some new part of the place, figure out a shortcut and head back to office. The walks really did me good. I remember now. *smiles*

So though this may come as no surprise to you, I'll admit it anyway. I resented my job a lot. I didn't know any better. I was young and felt in my spirit that i wasn't meant for a life in the cubicle, with stacks and stacks of documents in my inbox for company! I still believe that, come to think of it!

Nevertheless, I didn't know I had a choice to be happy in whatever i do. I didn't fully realize then, that when i said, "in EVERYTHING i do, i should do as unto the Lord", it meant just that. I didn't realize it covered my school activites, my job, my family life. EVERYTHING spiritual and seemingly UNspiritual. I hang my head in shame now just thinking about it, but I know i've grown some since then - and i'm still growing! *chuckles*

I remember being so glad on my last day. Silly me. But i do know that somewhere deep in, i did realize that i was much more better off and stronger character-wise because of the same job i had resented, the same job i had believed was the most horrible experience a girl could ever get, the same job i saw as an unfortunate circumstance ever to befall the likes of mankind.

Lord, you really know how to turn things around. *grateful grin*

Don't be there.

For the full song, click here.

"Don't Be There" - Switchfoot

Don't be there
'Cause I'm on my way

And I'm already gone over
And I'm on my way

And I can't recall myself
How I went down
Did I get shot
Or shoot myself

I'm down here
And you're way up there

But that doesn't hurt badly
But it stings right here

And I won't pretend there's
Nothing there
You be around and I'll be square
Don't be alarmed if I'm not there
You be around and I'll be square

If you're a rose
Then I'm the thorn
That's in your side

And does it hurt badly
'Cause it burns right here

I'd like to say hello
I'd like to say I care
I'd like to let you know
That nothing here's the same with me
Nothing here's the same

Don't be around
Don't be there
Don't be there

Have a listen to what i've been listening to throughout this whole week. Switchfoot has been, for a long time, been one of my favorite bands; and this song is from their older stuff. From the "Legend of Chin" to be precise. This one never did get old for me.

Then: because the melody was original and the music was nothing like what i've heard before. Simple yet.. Enough.
Now: because the lyrics speak louder, serving as a significant outlet for me. I can't just be writing my heart away to oblivion, can i?

*Note: If you found the "you be around and i'll be square" line a bit odd, you should probably take note that among the many meanings of "Square", according to Dictionary.com, is this:

Slang.
i. a person who is ignorant of or uninterested in current fads, ideas, manners, tastes, etc.;
ii. an old-fashioned, conventional, or conservative person.

Hope that helped. Haha.

Anyway, to wrap this up, this song speaks in my heart's voice. Hope you're charmed too. *smiles*

Lord, you know. Take all of me.

Mercury Rising

I watched this movie just recently (two months ago, i think) on cable TV. It's a 1998 thriller feature film, one that came about when i was twelve years old. I'd never heard of it before till this year. Ever since, I've always wanted to highlight this movie on my blog for reasons i will soon uncover, but hadn't remembered to. But now i do, and so here it is.

This is not going to be a typical movie review as i've never really been good at being an objective critic about things. In fact, this might even seem lop-sided to you. Nevertheless, cutting to the chase, I was personally very inspired by "Mercury Rising". It took quite a hefty helping of negative criticisms I've heard, but this is me. I liked the movie. Big Woof.

What inspired me was the plot, really. (Based on Ryne Douglas Pearson's 1996 novel; originally published as Simple Simon.)

(According to Wikipedia) A code called Mercury was created by The National Security Agency so complex that its creators believe no computer on earth can decipher it. Originally created during the Reagan Administration as a test to keep the United States' highest priority secrets under wraps, their assumption is realized to be false when they receive a message from an autistic savant boy named Simon (Miko Hughes) who calls the telephone number found within the code, which was secretly published in a puzzle magazine by two of the creators to see if anyone could break it. Colonel Kudrow (Alec Baldwin) seeks to silence Simon. Kudrow sends a hit man to murder Simon and his family.

After killing the boy's parents, the assassin searches the house, fails to find Simon, and leaves at the sound of approaching sirens. Art Jeffries (Bruce Willis) is an undercover FBI agent who protects Simon. He finds Simon hiding in a cache of his bedroom closet and takes the boy under his wing. Jeffries begins to realize the difficulty of protecting, let alone questioning Simon, because of his impaired social abilities as a result of his autism. The situation is further complicated by the fact that nobody at the FBI believes Simon is in any danger. Meanwhile, Colonel Kudrow, upset by disagreement over how to handle the case, murders one of his employees. The murdered employee's friend turns to Jeffries for help, and together they set a trap in which Kudrow is killed. The film ends with Simon being adopted by a new family.

Can you now guess why it impressed me that much? That's right. The protagonist was a brilliant autistic boy. He did the impossible by deciphering a code, and kept himself the safest way he knew how. He had his address memorized. He remembered and distinguished strangers from friends. He cracked puzzles like they were simple arithmetic.

That's where Phanuel is going.
(Who's Phanuel? Click here.)

No, he doesn't have to be deciphering codes (or anything along those lines) to be going down that direction. If he does, that would be so coo. But more significantly, I want Phanuel to be able to live life in full capacity, utilize his full potential, dream big dreams, and set out to achieve them. His life is going to make a difference. Somehow. 'Cause that's how the Lord intended it to be.

Reality is a little bit more harsh. People make hasty judgements. Their pessimism gets to us more often than not, and we can't help but wonder "what if" and "how". Nevertheless, it is in these times that I am reminded of the time when Phanuel was far worse than he is today.

He could hardly maintain eye contact, couldn't respond to his name, didn't understand the purpose of "the potty", hardly uttered a word, spins around without stopping (even when he felt sick), etc.

As of today, he reads, he does simple arithmetic, he creates powerpoint presentations, surfs his favorite websites, watches videos, tells us what he wants verbally (he started out pointing at things first), he sings and composes his own songs, and expresses himself well. He hasn't quite arrived yet, but look how far he has come! We could hardly have imagined him achieving so much within the span of seven to eight years. And there's so much more in him!

I'm excited to know what God has in store for him. We just can't give up on him now, you know? Every moment is vital. Every lesson may be a stepping stone to the greatness he will become. And i anticipate his arrival with bated breath.

Hope with me. Pray with me.

(Plot and Low Resolution Poster grabbed from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mercury_Rising)

Retreat, Soldiers, RETREAT!!

Unfinished and always will be. *smiles*

"O God, let us be
a Generation that seeks
That seeks your face
O God of Jacob"

I'm killing myself for words here.

Don't get me wrong. The PK Retreat in Genting Highlands was nothing short of glorious. But the string of vocabulary I'm coming up with don't seem to quite add up to the imprint the getaway left on me. It's like getting stabbed with a dagger and then weeks later, poking your mamaking-kakis in the side with your finger to let them know how that dagger felt.

If that made any sense.

I have no day to day accounts of the experience (sorry to disappoint), hugely caused by my weak excuse for memory power. But I'm sure you'd be most content with the little i have to offer you. I distinctly remember vacuumed moments in worship, when everybody disappeared. when all i saw was him. I remember moments when i reached out my left arm as high as it could go and felt him grasp my fingers. I remember holding to him tight whilst clutching my heart, hardly able to contain whatever that was bursting out of it.

I met him. But my experience was not exceptional. Many of the like-minded met him too. And i'm just so excited to be a part of this experience; to be part of the group that met him.

"You have turned
my mourning into dancing
You have turned
my sorrow into joy"

I do remember madness on the first night though. I remember running for my life. Yelling a string of inaudibles and admitting to major lack of stamina. Earned a lovely carpet-graze on my right knee.

It looks more revolting now, actually. I have septic slime oozing out of it.

Joash had an opportunity to worship lead, the morning of the third day, but he came up to me the second night and asked if i'd like to. I was quite surprised actually and even asked him if he was sure. The whole thing was quite a challenge as we had a bunch of rookie musicians; but honest to goodness, rookies who were all ready to learn and who did exceptionally well! I couldn't have asked for a better group. Everyone remained in good spirits and we practiced till 1:3o-ish that morning, i believe.

Whilst practicing, I made poor Jewls, Joel and Paul-o play invisible instruments; grabbed Jonan, Phile and Kenrick Kong to sing harmonies, and Mikha was handling the accoustic guitar. I don't think i speak for myself when i say we enjoyed every diminutive minute of practice! It was awesome! There were some folks who came to join us that night, so it became a good night of fellowship too.

I remember asking Joash for advice earlier that night, as i was quite nervous when the musicians told me they weren't familiar with many of the songs i had in mind. He had this calmness about him that really helps soothe the panicking soul. He said, "There's no need to do six songs, no need to conform. Four's good." Asked him for his opinion about some songs that I finally chose and got his nod of approval.

Jonan and Kenrick were a great asset to me as they really helped in terms of smoothening out creases in the technicalities. Chords, timing and backup melodies. They were also just downright great company! There should have been more microphones! One for each! Don't you agree?

All in all, I believe God truly took the helm from us that morning and steered it the way he wanted it to go.

Aside that, I enjoyed the meal times! It became the most exciting part of the day, no doubt for its network-expansion possibilities, but also it was thrilling to meet so many expectant faces. Faces that were eager to meet God, faces that held stories behind them, faces that weren't mere faces - but containers of passion and potential.

I mean, who can fathom the depth of our capacity? Capacity to play PICTIONARY all night long, for instance!

We stayed up till 5 a.m., completing the attempt to end the game. Good times, good times. I doubt i'm very hooked up to pictionary yet though. I'm still a hopeless fanatic of TABOO.

"Give us clean hands
Give us pure hearts
Let us not lift our souls to another"

Personally, i treasured the moments i spent with God. I had a lot of things to let go of, and surrendered them to him one by one. At each opportunity i got. Tore it away from my flesh. And it hurt. Madly. but he was there. and i knew i was safe.

PKs sure do rock! Hope to once again be able to gather with such an awesome bunch of people, to participate in such an amazing experience, and to have many more meets with such an indescribable God!

"Amazing Love, I know it's true
'Cause it's my joy to honor you
In all I do, I'll honor you"

(Images courtesy of Shua and Michel)